The first thing to realize about a counteroffer is that you are going to receive one!
The second realization is that if you have been honest with yourself and your search consultant on why you want to make a change, then the counteroffer should be another reinforcement to leave your current organization.
Early on, your Search Consultant probably asked these three questions:
1. What is the dream opportunity that would motivate you to make a career change?
2. What do you like about your current position and company?
3. If you met with your current CEO, what things would you specify you would like to change about your current position, job responsibilities, company culture, products, etc.
If the answers to questions 1 and 3 are dramatic in highlighting what your current position does not offer, those are statements to remember when you submit your resignation. These were your honest feelings before any counteroffer pressure or “mind games” begin with your employer.
What to expect:
Upon resigning, your current boss will ask you to stay and will confront you with a counteroffer. 
Career changes are tough enough as it is, and anxieties about leaving a comfortable job, friends and location and having to reprove yourself again in an unknown opportunity can cloud the best logic. But just because the new position is a little scary doesn’t mean it’s not a positive move. Since counteroffers can create confusion and buyer’s remorse, you should understand what’s being cast upon you.
Counter offers are typically made as some form of flattery, e.g.:
- “You’re too valuable. We need you.”
- “You can’t desert the team/your friends and leave them hanging.”
- “We were just about to give you a promotion/raise, and it was confidential until now.”
- “What did they offer? Why are you leaving? And what do you need in order to stay?”
- “Why would you want to work for that company?
- “The President/CEO wants to meet with you before you make your final decision.”
Counteroffers usually take the form of more money:
- A modified reporting structure
- Promises or future considerations
- Disparaging remarks about the new company or job
- Guilt trips
Of course, since we all prefer to think we’re #1, it’s natural to want to believe these manipulative appeals, but beware!!
THINK ABOUT IT:
If you were worth “$X” yesterday, why are they suddenly willing to pay you “$X + $n” today, when you weren’t expecting a raise anytime soon?
Also consider how you’ve felt when someone resigned from your staff. The reality is that employers don’t like to be “FIRED”. Your boss is likely concerned that he’ll look bad, his career may suffer. Bosses are judged in part, by their ability to retain staff. Your leaving may jeopardize an important project, increase workload for others or even foul up vacation schedules. It’s never a good time for someone to quit. It may prove time consuming and costly to replace you. It’s much cheaper to keep you, even at a slightly higher salary and it would be better to fire you later, in the company’s time frame.
Accepting a counteroffer can have many negative consequences. You might want to consider these thoughts:
- Where did the additional money or responsibility come from?
- Was it your next raise or promotion – just given early?
- Will you be limited in the future?
- Will you have to threaten to quit in order to get your next raise?
- Might a cheaper replacement be sought out?
You’ve demonstrated your unhappiness or lack of blind loyalty, and will be perceived as having committed blackmail to gain a raise. You won’t ever be considered a team player again. Many employers will hold a grudge at the next review period, and you may be placed at the top of the next reduction-in-force “hit list”.
Apart from a short-term, band-aid treatment, nothing will change within the company. After the dust settles from this upheaval, you’ll be in the same old rut.
Finally, when you make your decision, look at your current job and the new position as if you were unemployed. Which opportunity holds the most real potential? Probably the new one, or you wouldn’t have accepted it in the first place.